The Python A Python I should not advise, -
It needs a doctor for its eyes,
And has the measles yearly.
Subject it to music However, if you feel inclined
To get one(to improve your mind,
And not from fashion merely),
Allow no music near its cage;
Flies into a rage And when it flies into a rage
Chastise it, most severely.
An aunt in Yucatan I had an aunt in Yucatan
Who bought a Python from a man
And kept it for a pet.
She died, because she never knew
These simple little rules and few; -
The snake The Snake is living yet.
The Cambrian Welsh The Cambrian Welsh or Mountain Sheep
Is of the Ovine race,
His conversation is not deep,
But then - observehis face!
Porcupine What! would you slap the Porcupine?
Unhappy child - desist!
Alas! that any friend of mine
Should turn Tupto-philist.
To strike the creature To strike the meanest and the least
Of creatures is a sin,
With prickes on its skin How much more bad to beat a beast
With prickles on its skin.
Out of bed The Scorpion is as black as soot,
He dearly loves to bite;
He is a most unpleasant brute
To find in bed, at night.
The Crocodile Whatever our faults, we can always engage
That no fancy or fable shall sully our page,
So take note of what follows, I beg.
This creature so grand and august in its age,
In its youth is hatched out of an egg.
The Missionary 1 And oft in some far Coptic town
The Missionary sits him down
To breakfast by the Nile:
The heart beneath his priestly gown
Is innocent of guile;
The Missionary 2 When suddenly the rigid frown
Of Panic is observed to drown
His customary smile.
Why does he leap Why does he start and leap amain,
Scour the sandy Libyan plain And scour the sandy Libyan plain
Like one who wants to catch a train Like one that wants to catch a
train,
Or wrestles with internal pain Or wrestles with internal pain?
Egg-cup Because he finds his egg contain -
Green, hungry, horrible and plain -
An Infant Crocodile.
The Vulture The Vulture eats between his meals,
And that's the reason why
As well as you or I He very, very rarely feels
As well as you and I.
His eye is dull, his head is bald,
His neck is growing thinner.
Oh! what a lesson for us all
To only eat at dinner!
The Bison The Bison is vain, and(I write it with pain)
The Door-mat you see on his head
The opulent growth Is not, as some learned professors maintain,
The opulent growth of a genius' brain;
Sewn on with needle and thread But is sewn on with needle and
thread.
The Viper Yet another great truth I record in my verse,
That some Vipers are venomous, some the reverse;
A fact you may prove if you try,
Procuring two vipers By procuring two Vipers, and letting them
bite;
A fright With the first you are only the worse for a fright,
After the second But after the second you die.
The Llama The Llama is a woolly sort of fleecy hairy goat,
With an indolent expression and an undulating throat
Like an unsuccessful literary man.
Find it in the atlas And I know the place he lives in(or at least -
I think I do)
It is Ecuador, Brazilor Chili - possibly Peru;
You must find it in the Atlas if you can.
Lord of Turkestan The Llama of the Pampasses you never should
confound
(In spite of a deceptive similarity of sound)
With the Lhama who is Lord of Turkestan.
The ruminant For the former is a beautiful and valuable beast,
But the latter is not lovable nor useful in the least;
And the Ruminant is preferable surely to the Priest
Who battens on the woful superstitions of the East,
The Mongol of the Monastery of Shan.
The Chamois The Chamois inhabits
Lucerne, where his habits
(Though why I have not an idea-r)
Give him sudden short spasms
On the brink of deep chasms,
And he lives in perpetual fear.
The Mammoth This Creature, though rare, is still found to the
East
Of the Northern Siberian Zone.
Melting It is known to the whole of that primitive group
That the carcass will furnish an excellent soup,
Though the cooking it offers one drawback at least
(Of a serious nature I own):
Deflated mammoth If the skin be but punctured before it is
boiled,
Your confection is wholly and utterly spoiled.
The dainty is unknown And hence(on account of the size of the
beast)
The dainty is nearly unknown.
The Microbe The Microbe is so very small
You cannot make him out at all,
But many sanguine people hope
To see him through a microscope.
His jointed tongue that lies beneath
A hundred curious rows of teeth;
His seven tufted tails with lots
Of lovely pink and purple spots,
The microbe larger On each of which a pattern stands,
Composed of forty separate bands;
His eyebrows of a tender green;
All these have never yet been seen -
But Scientists, who ought to know,
Assure us that they must be so. . . .
Oh! let us never, never doubt
What nobody is sure about!
The scientist