During the summer of 1953, Esther Greenwood, a 19-year-old girl, finds herself interning at Ladies' Day magazine in New York City. Winning an essay contest secured her the coveted position, but despite the envy-inducing opportunity, Esther feels a profound sense of apathy and emptiness. She compares her emotional state to "the calm center of a storm". Hailing from the suburbs of Boston, Esther struggles to connect with her fellow interns, who mainly come from wealthy backgrounds and seem to be waiting for a suitable husband. However, she does manage to befriend Doreen, a sharp-witted girl from the South, and Betsy, a wholesome intern with a typical American appearance and demeanor.
One day, Esther and Doreen are on their way to a party when they encounter Lenny Shepherd, a radio host who offers to join them for a drink. Lenny is immediately drawn to Doreen, while Esther gets paired up with Lenny's friend Frankie, who she finds unattractive due to his short stature. The group heads to a bar, and despite having no previous experience with alcohol, Esther impulsively orders a neat vodka. Feeling somewhat liberated by this newfound persona, Esther introduces herself to Frankie as "Elly Higginbottom" from Chicago. When Frankie asks her to dance, she declines, and eventually, he leaves the scene.
Esther and Doreen accompany Lenny back to his apartment. Sensing potential trouble, Doreen asks Esther to stay as a precaution. Meanwhile, Esther watches as Doreen and Lenny engage in a playful dance while she herself feels isolated and detached from the situation. Their playful antics escalate, with Lenny affectionately calling Doreen a derogatory term and playfully biting her. In the midst of all this, Doreen's dress slips down, exposing her breasts, which serves as a signal for Esther to make
her exit.
Feeling a sense of loneliness and detachment from the city, Esther walks back to the Amazon hotel where she and the other interns are staying. From her window, she looks out at New York, contemplating her disconnection from the bustling cityscape. In an attempt to lift her spirits, she decides to take a bath, symbolically cleansing herself of the events of the night until she feels "pure and innocent like a newborn baby". Exhausted from the night's events, she eventually falls asleep.
However, her slumber is soon interrupted by a drunken Doreen banging on her door. Unwilling to shoulder the responsibility of taking care of Doreen, Estheropts to leave her in the hallway. As she lowers Doreen to the floor, Doreen vomits and passes out. This repulses Esther, leading her to conclude that she shares more similarities with Betsy, the wholesome intern, rather than Doreen.
At the banquet, Esther enjoys the luxurious food, a stark contrast to her humble upbringing. Meanwhile, Doreen is off having fun at Coney Island with Lenny. Sitting next to Betsy, Esther is questioned about her absence from the morning's fur show. Overwhelmed with emotion, Esther confesses that her absence was a result of being reprimanded by her supervisor, Jay Cee.
Reflecting on the morning, Esther was torn between joining Doreen and Lenny or attending the fur show like the other interns. Instead, she spent the morning feeling down in bed until she received a call from Jay Cee to come into the office. During their conversation, Jay Cee inquired if Esther found her work boring and asked about her future plans after graduation. Esther struggled with her response but eventually mentioned her interest in publishing. Jay Cee advised her to stand out by learning foreign languages, even though her busy senior-year schedule made it impractical.
Esther longs for a mother figure like Jay Cee, unlike her real mother who adheres to traditional beliefs. Her mother earns a living by teaching writing and typing but holds resentment towards Esther's late father for leaving them with no money. She emphasizes the importance of practical skills, like typing, in order to support oneself, stating that even
the apostles had to earn a living.
During the banquet, Esther discovers the use of a fingerbowl and reminisces about the first time she encountered one at the home of Philomena Guinea, a renowned author whose scholarship funds her education. Ignorantly mistaking it for soup, Esther drank the entire contents of the small bowl filled with warm water and flowers.
Following the banquet, Esther joins the other interns at a movie premiere but starts feeling unwell. She leaves the event accompanied by Betsy, and as they reach their hotel, both girls begin to vomit. Overwhelmed by sickness, Esther locks herself in the bathroom and continues to vomit until she faints. Upon regaining consciousness, a nurse informs her that all the girls who attended the banquet have fallen ill due to food poisoning. The nurse attends to Esther, providing a sedative injection and putting her to bed. Esther wakes up again tofind Doreen beside her, completely recovered. Doreen reveals that the crabmeat salad served at the banquet was contaminated with ptomaine.
The next morning at seven o'clock, Esther receives a phone call from Constantin, a UN interpreter and a friend of Mrs. Willard, Buddy Willard's mother. Constantin offers to give Esther a tour of the UN and take her out for lunch, although she agrees reluctantly. While waiting for lunchtime, Esther reflects on her relationship with Buddy, her boyfriend who is currently recovering from tuberculosis in the Adirondacks. They grew up in the same neighborhood, and Esther used to have admiration for him from a distance. However, now that he wants to marry her, she sees him as a hypocrite and suspects that he is only waiting until he recovers to end their relationship.
Esther reads a short story about a fig tree growing on a lawn between a convent and a Jewish man's house. The Jewish man and a nun from the convent meet daily under the tree to pick its figs. One day, they discover a baby bird hatching on one of its branches, and their hands briefly touch as they watch the bird emerge. After that, a different woman
starts picking the figs instead.
This story deeply resonates with Esther, and she interprets it as a symbol for her relationship with Buddy. She envisions them meeting beneath their own fig tree, but instead of a bird hatching, she imagines witnessing the birth of a baby. She feels guilty about her thoughts concerning Buddy while he is in the sanatorium in the Adirondacks. He has been writing her numerous letters about how doctors and writers can coexist, but Esther recalls that two years ago, he dismissed poetry as insignificant, referring to it as mere dust.
Esther recalls the origins of her relationship with Buddy. Their mothers are close friends, and one day he visited her house to inform her that he would visit her at college at some point. In March, he stopped by her dormitory to greet her on his way to accompany another girl named Joan Gilling to a dance. Feeling hurt, Esther pretended that she had numerous dates with two men from Dartmouth. Despite this, Buddy gave her a letter inviting her to attend Yale's junior prom. During the dance, Buddy treated her with a detached kindness, like "a friend or a relative." However, afterwards, he took her tothe Yale chemistry lab and kissed her. Esther found the kiss unexciting, but she was thrilled to share the experience with the other girls in her dormitory.
Esther recounts her visit to Buddy at Yale Medical School during a long weekend. During her stay, Buddy shows her cadavers and preserved fetuses, which she observes with a composed demeanor. However, witnessing a live birth unsettles her. The woman giving birth, Mrs. Tomolillo, is under the influence of a potent painkiller and undergoes a cesarean section to deliver her son. Esther perceives this painkiller as something that a man would create, designed to erase the memory of childbirth and deceive women into getting pregnant again, thus reopening a "long, dark, and painful corridor" within their bodies.
Later, in Buddy's dorm room, he asks Esther if she has ever seen a naked man. She responds negatively, prompting Buddy to inquire if she would like to see him undressed. Agreeing, Buddy removes his pants and underwear. However, upon seeing his genitals, Esther experiences feelings of disgust and depression. On a whim, she asks him if he has ever slept with a woman, expecting him to deny it. To her surprise,
Buddy confesses that he had been seduced by a waitress named Gladys while working as a busboy the previous summer. This revelation leaves Esther feeling emotionally frozen. She is more disturbed by Buddy's hypocrisy in presenting himself as a pure and innocent virgin rather than being upset by the fact that he had been intimate with someone else. Upon returning to college, Esther seeks the opinions of her fellow students about how they would react if their boyfriends admitted to sleeping with other women. However, they all suggest that there aren't many accusations a girl can make against a man unless they are in a committed or engaged relationship.
Esther inquires about Buddy's mother's opinion of Gladys. Buddy's mother, Mrs. Willard, holds traditional beliefs and often expresses ideas like "a man is a projectile towards the future, while a woman is the starting point from which the projectile departs". Upon hearing Buddy's confession, Esther decides to end their relationship. However, before she can do so, Buddy calls to inform her that he has tuberculosis(TB). Esther feels relieved that she won't have to see him and fabricates a story to her dorm mates, claiming that she and Buddy are "practically engaged." As Esther spends Saturdays studying inthe dormitory, her peers treat her with kindness, admiring her ability to remain composed and strong.
In simpler terms:
A man named Constantin, who is short but attractive, picks up Esther and drives her to the United Nations. On the way, he holds her hand, and Esther feels an intense joy that she hasn't felt since her childhood when her father was alive. When they enter an auditorium at the UN, Esther realizes that she had only experienced true happiness until she was nine years old.
While at the UN, Esther is impressed by a strong Russian girl who is doing a translation. This makes Esther reflect on the skills she lacks. She hasn't learned shorthand and dislikes the idea of transcribing men's letters for the rest of her life - she wants to write her own letters. She also can't dance, sing, or speak a foreign language. This is the first time that Esther feels inadequate. She imagines her life as a fig tree, with each branch symbolizing a different possible future: being a dutiful wife, a world traveler, an Olympic champion, or a famous editor. But she feels
overwhelmed by the choices and is unable to decide on a path. Eventually, all her potential options seem to fade away.
After their visit to the UN, Constantin takes Esther to a fancy restaurant. Esther feels better after eating, and as they reach dessert, she decides to let Constantin take her virginity. Ever since she found out about Buddy's affair, she has wanted to sleep with someone. Esther thinks back to a conversation she had with a man named Eric about sex. Eric told her a story about losing his virginity to a prostitute, which left him feeling unsatisfied. He believed that sleeping with someone he loved would degrade them and reduce them to being "just an animal like the rest." At one point, Esther considered sleeping with Eric because he seemed less focused on dirty thoughts than other boys she knew, but he later wrote her a letter confessing his love for her. As a result, he could never sleep with her.
Constantin invites Esther to his house, and she contemplates the idea of sleeping with him. She remembers an article her mother sent her called "In Defense of Chastity," which argued that men and women have different emotions and experiences, and only marriage can truly unite them. The article warned that menwill try to convince a woman to have sex with them but will lose respect for her once she agrees. Esther reflects on how the article fails to consider a woman's feelings. She finds it unfair that women have to live a pure and single life while men can lead a dual life, one pure and one not. Esther sees the world as divided between virgins and nonvirgins and believes that joining the latter category will bring about a significant personal change.
Esther and Constantin lie down on his bed, and she finds him incredibly attractive, but she worries that she will start finding fault with him as soon as he starts liking her. She doesn't want to marry someone who will ultimately disappoint her; instead, she desires a life filled with excitement and freedom. They fall asleep without touching, but when Esther wakes up disoriented at 3 a.m., she studies Constantin's face and reflects on the idea of marriage.
She believes that no matter how well a man treats a woman before marriage, all he wants afterward is for her to submit and give up her own desires. She recalls Buddy telling her that she would stop wanting to write poetry after having children, as though she would be brainwashed. When Constantin wakes up to drive Esther home, she acts coldly towards him.
Esther remembers visiting Buddy at a run-down sanatorium, where she is disappointed by the unattractive building and Buddy's weight gain from the food there. She had imagined him as more attractive and slim. In Buddy's room, he asks Esther if she wants to marry him, but she firmly states that she never wants to get married. She reminds Buddy of a previous conversation where he called her a "true neurotic" for wanting both city and country life.
Later in the day, Buddy takes Esther skiing on Mount Pisgah and insists that she ski down an advanced course from the top of the mountain. It doesn't occur to Esther to refuse. As she stands at the top, she calmly realizes that she wants to end her life. With this thought in mind, she starts skiing down the hill, feeling a sense of freedom and happiness. It feels like she's shedding the years of pretending and compromising. However, she collides with another skier and falls hard. Despite wanting to ski the mountain again, Buddy touches her leg and reveals that itis broken in two places, sounding oddly satisfied.
On Esther's final day in Manhattan, which coincides with the execution of the Rosenbergs, Jay Cee asks her to come to her office to have her picture taken for a feature in Ladies' Day. However, when asked to smile for the photo, Esther bursts into uncontrollable sobs. Trying to comfort her, Jay Cee offers her a stack of manuscripts and mentions a summer writing course taught by a renowned writer, which Esther has applied for. This idea of the writing course brings some hope to Esther, and she decides to submit the stories she writes during the class to Ladies' Day using a pseudonym, intending to surprise Jay Cee.
Later, Doreen persuades Esther to attend a dance at a country club with Lenny and a blind date. As Esther nears the end of her internship, she becomes increasingly apathetic and unsure of herself. Looking at her expensive clothes in her room, she tells Doreen that she can't bear to face them when she returns. Understanding her sentiment, Doreen hides all of Esther's clothes under her bed.
When Doreen and Esther arrive at the dance, Esther fails to recognize
Lenny, even when Doreen enthusiastically greets him. Esther's blind date for the night is Marco, a tall and dark man who sports a diamond pin on his tie. Marco gifts Esther the diamond and implies that he expects some sort of "service" in return for its value. He forcefully squeezes her arm, leaving bruises, and Esther quickly senses his disdain for women, labeling him a "woman-hater." Despite Esther's reluctance to dance, Marco throws away her drink and pulls her onto the dance floor for a tango. Esther protests that she doesn't know how to dance, but Marco insists she pretend she is drowning as he pulls her tightly against him.
After the tango, Marco leads Esther to the club's garden. Curious, Esther asks him about the person he's in love with, and he confesses his love for his first cousin who happens to be a nun. Esther reassures him that he will eventually find love with someone else. Suddenly, Marco becomes violent. He throws Esther to the ground and forcefully climbs on top of her, tearing her dress in the process. In that moment, Esther contemplates whether to allow the assault to happen if she just lies still. However, when Marco insults her by calling her aslut, Esther's instinct to defend herself takes over. She retaliates by punching him in the face, causing his nose to bleed. Marco smears the blood across Esther's face. Frustrated, he demands to know the whereabouts of his diamond, but Esther defiantly refuses to disclose its location. She leaves him futilely searching for the diamond in the muddy ground and manages to hitch a ride back to Manhattan. Once she arrives at the Amazon hotel, she ascends to the sunroof and throws all of her expensive clothes into the darkness below.
On the train ride back to Connecticut, Esther opts to wear a blouse and skirt borrowed from her friend Betsy. Remarkably, she chooses not to wash off the streaks of Marco's blood on her face as she finds them somewhat poignant and impressive. Upon reaching the station, Esther's mother awaits her. However, their reunion takes a sour turn as Esther's mother reveals that she has been rejected from the writing course she had applied for. Despite anticipating this outcome, Esther feels disappointed. The writing course had been her beacon of hope during her miserable time in New York, and now she is faced with the prospect
of spending her summer in the suburbs.
Returning to her modest clapboard house, Esther becomes bored and resorts to observing her neighbors from her window. Among them is a pregnant woman named Dodo Conway, whom Esther finds both intriguing and repulsive due to her Catholic background and the ever-expanding size of her family.
Esther's friend from Cambridge, Jody, reaches out to her via phone to inquire about her plans to move in with her. Esther confesses that she will no longer be coming to Cambridge, having been rejected from the writing course. Jody suggests that Esther join regardless and take a different course, but Esther is haunted by a voice inside her head urging Jody to let another girl take her place. Although Esther regrets her decision as soon as she hangs up, she cannot muster the courage to call Jody back. Instead, she contacts the Cambridge summer school and withdraws her admission.
In the dining room, Esther discovers a letter from Buddy. It reveals that Buddy has developed feelings for a nurse at the sanatorium and suggests that if Esther joins him and his mother at a cabin in the Adirondacks, there might be a chance for their love to be rekindled. On the back ofthe same paper, Esther writes a response stating that she is now engaged to a simultaneous interpreter and has no intention of seeing Buddy again. Inspired to spend her summer pursuing her writing aspirations, Esther decides to work on a book. She plans to create a protagonist named Elaine, inspired by herself. However, she soon realizes that she lacks the necessary life experiences to write a compelling novel.
That night, while lying in bed, Esther becomes overwhelmed with various potential future plans. In the midst of it all, she listens to her mother's snoring and imagines silencing her violently. The restless night leaves Esther unable to sleep. The next morning, she attempts to read Finnegan's Wake but struggles to make sense of the words. Frustrated, she contemplates giving up on her thesis and even considers withdrawing from her university to attend the city college where her mother teaches. However, none of the envisioned future paths seem appealing to her. In search of respite, Esther contacts her doctor, Teresa, asking for more sleeping pills. Teresa, concerned about Esther's mental state, suggests she see a psychiatrist.
Esther finds herself in the office of Dr. Gordon, a psychiatrist. She has been experiencing severe insomnia for a week, neglecting her personal hygiene, and feeling completely drained by everything around her. The mere thought of the days ahead seems like an overwhelming, never-ending stretch of time.
Dr. Gordon, an exceptionally attractive man, instantly triggers Esther's dislike. He asks her to explain what she believes is the matter. She mentions her inability to sleep or eat, but conveniently omits the recent deterioration of her handwriting. Esther expects Dr. Gordon to diagnose her immediately, but instead, he inquires about the college she attends and shares that he used to work as a doctor at the college's Women's Army Corps(WAC) station.
While in Boston Common, Esther encounters a young sailor who flirts with her. She introduces herself as Elly Higginbottom, a parentless individual from Chicago. Mistakenly believing she sees Mrs. Willard, Esther warns the sailor to keep his hands off her, only to realize her error. Overwhelmed by emotions, she begins to cry, briefly convincing herself that the mysterious woman is responsible for all the misfortunes in her life.
Esther returns to Dr. Gordon's office for a second appointment. Feeling no improvement since the previous week, she has now endured fourteen sleepless nights. She shows him the torn fragments of a lettershe attempted to write to Doreen before tearing it up. In response, Dr. Gordon requests to speak with Esther's mother. She leaves the office and waits anxiously in the parking lot. When her mother returns, she is in tears because Dr. Gordon has recommended Esther for electroshock therapy at his private hospital in Walton.
While reading the newspaper, Esther comes across a story about someone's attempted suicide. Deep in thought, she ponders the height from which one would have to jump to guarantee death. Thoughts of Japanese samurais committing seppuku, a form of suicide involving stomach stabbing with a sword, cross her mind. Esther admires the bravery displayed by those who choose such methods to end their lives. Meanwhile, her scheduled treatment at Walton is set for the following morning. Filled with the desire to escape to Chicago, she realizes that
she cannot afford bus fare as the bank has already closed.
While at Dr. Gordon's hospital, Esther observes the motionless patients in the living room, comparing their stillness to mannequins. Dr. Gordon escorts her downstairs for her treatment, and along the way, they encounter a distressed woman attempting to jump out of a window, restrained by a nurse with crossed eyes. In the treatment room, Esther lies down on a bed as Dr. Gordon attaches metal plates to the sides of her head and provides her with a wire to bite down on. The electricity coursing through her body feels cataclysmic, leaving her pondering what terrible deed she must have committed to warrant such punishment. After the treatment, Dr. Gordon inquires about her well-being. Despite feeling terrible, Esther assures him that she is fine. He brings up her college and repeats his comment about the WAC station.
Back at home, Esther confesses to her mother that she has decided to end her sessions with Dr. Gordon. Her mother expresses relief, believing that Esther is unlike the other mental patients and will "choose to be alright again." Esther has been unable to sleep for twenty-one consecutive nights.
Later on, Esther finds herself contemplating suicide once more at a nearby park. On that morning, she had attempted to slit her wrists but was unable to follow through, ending up making only a small cut on her leg instead. Thoughts of all the cruel and critical remarks ever directed at her flood her mind. Eventually, she contemplates boarding a bus to Deer Island Prison. There,she engages in a flirtatious encounter with a young prison guard, allowing herself to imagine a different life where she could have met him earlier, married him, and started a family. While on the beach, she entertains the idea of drowning herself, but the shock of the cold water on her feet instinctively leads her to retreat, and she gives up on the notion.
Esther accompanies Jody and her boyfriend Mark to the beach, where Mark introduces her to his friend, Cal. Uncertain if her former self would
have liked Cal, Esther feels a profound emptiness in her mind. During a conversation with Cal, they discuss a play in which a mother contemplates killing her son. Curious, Esther asks Cal how he would end his own life, but is disappointed when he responds with using a gun, viewing it as a typical male response. Frustrated, Esther enters the water, intending to exhaust herself and drown by swimming towards a large rock.
Earlier that morning, Esther had attempted to hang herself, but was unable to find a suitable place to attach the rope. In a desperate act, she tried to strangle herself with her mother's bathrobe cord. However, each time she tightened the cord, her hands would involuntarily loosen, as if her body was striving to protect itself.
Realizing that her body would once again rebel and climb out of the water if she reached the rock, Esther decides to drown herself in the vast expanse of the ocean. However, no matter how many times she dives underwater, she resurfaces, unable to stay submerged. Defeated, Esther gives up and swims back to the shore.
Esther's mother believes that helping others is the remedy for excessive self-reflection, so she enrolls Esther as a volunteer at a nearby hospital. Esther is assigned the task of delivering flowers to the maternity ward, but she mistakenly mixes up the bouquets, resulting in the patients becoming agitated. Overwhelmed and panicked, she hastily leaves the hospital. Seeking solace, Esther visits her father's grave in the local cemetery and experiences a profound moment of grief, shedding tears for the first time since his passing.
Later that same day, Esther makes a definitive decision about how she will end her own life. She secretly takes a bottle of sleeping pills from her mother's belongings and retreats to the cellar. Finding a small opening under the breezeway, Esther enters it and conceals the entrancewith logs. She consumes the entire contents of the pill bottle, inducing a state of unconsciousness.
Esther regains consciousness, but her vision is impaired, and she initially believes she has lost her sight. However, someone removes the bandages covering her eyes, and she finds herself in a hospital bed. Her
mother and brother visit her, along with a man named George Bakewell, whom Esther does not recognize. Bakewell claims to be the hospital's houseman, but she doubts his identity and tells him to leave.
Feeling a strong desire to see her reflection, Esther insists on having a mirror. The nurse hesitates, warning her that she may not like what she sees, but eventually gives in. To Esther's confusion, she looks at what appears to be a picture rather than a mirror. The person in the image is unrecognizable, with a shaved head and a bruised face. It takes a moment for Esther to realize that she is actually looking at her own distorted reflection. This revelation causes her to shatter the mirror in anger, much to the nurses' dismay. As a result, Esther is transferred to a different hospital's special ward, which functions as an asylum.
In the new asylum, Esther shares a ward with a woman named Mrs. Tomolillo. A group of medical students visit Esther, and she worries that news of her hospitalization will reach her friend Buddy. During a visit from her mother, Esther observes Mrs. Tomolillo imitating her mother's gestures and becomes convinced that the doctors and staff are using absurd pseudonyms like "Dr. Syphilis" and "Dr. Pancreas" to conceal their true identities. Desperate to leave the hospital, Esther pleads with her mother, who promises to help if Esther cooperates with her doctors.
Esther remains skeptical of the asylum staff, suspecting them of deceit and intentionally messing with her mind. One day, she becomes outraged when she is served two different types of beans for dinner and kicks the server, convinced that he did it on purpose to unsettle her. After kicking a nurse's thermometer to the ground, she is moved to a different room.
Philomena Guinea learns about Esther's situation and reveals that she was once institutionalized herself. She decides to financially support Esther's transfer to a respected private hospital and even travels to Boston to assist her in the process. Despite the generosity, Esther finds it difficult to feel grateful. She believes that no matter where sheis, her mental illness will continue to isolate her from the outside world like being trapped under a glass bell jar.
During the journey to the new hospital, Esther contemplates opening
the car door and jumping off a bridge but misses the opportunity. The private hospital proves to be a significant improvement compared to Dr. Gordon's institution. Esther now has her own room and a new psychiatrist named Dr. Nolan. She meets Valerie, a girl in the lounge who appears completely unaffected by mental illness.
Dr. Nolan visits Esther in her room and inquires about her previous treatments. Esther recounts her experiences with Dr. Gordon and electroshock therapy, expressing her firm determination to commit suicide if the treatment is repeated. Dr. Nolan assures Esther that the previous treatment was performed incorrectly and promises to inform her in advance if it is to be administered again.
Esther begins receiving insulin injections three times a day, hoping for a reaction, but instead gains weight. Valerie, who has had a lobotomy and no longer experiences anger, shows Esther scars on her temples and expresses her contentment with staying in the asylum indefinitely.
As Esther continues her stay in the hospital, she is moved to a nicer room, indicating progress in her recovery. A nurse informs her that an old friend named Joan Gilling will be occupying the room next to hers. Confused, Esther enters the neighboring room and finds Joan sitting by the window.
Joan shares with Esther that her troubles began with a summer job that caused her to develop painful bunions and feel miserable. She decided to quit her job, retreat from others, and even contemplate suicide. Seeking help, she was referred to a psychiatrist who allowed medical students to observe her and recommended group therapy, which she found insulting and absurd. Feeling disillusioned, she stumbled upon an article about Esther's experience in the local newspaper. It had a profound impact on her, leading her to go to New York and injure herself by thrusting her arms through a window.
One night, Esther wakes up experiencing a physical reaction to her insulin treatment. Although she initially feels better, the improvement diminishes by the time she meets with Dr. Nolan again. Dr. Nolan shares that there won't be any more visitors for a while, which brings relief to Esther. She despises visits because she knows that her friends and
family are comparing her to the person shewas before her mental health declined. Esther particularly resents visits from her mother, who always pleads to know what she did wrong. On her birthday, Esther's mother brought her a bouquet of roses, which she promptly discarded. Seeking to shock Dr. Nolan, Esther declares her hatred for her mother, but Dr. Nolan appears satisfied with her response.
Esther is transferred to Belsize, a ward for women who are soon to be discharged. Although she doesn't feel any improvement, she is relieved to escape the threat of electroconvulsive therapy. Joan, who Esther sees as a mirror image of her former self, is also at Belsize. The other women in the ward are fashionable and talkative, which makes Esther feel insecure. Joan fits in easily with them and treats Esther with a hint of condescension. In the living room, Joan shows the other women a magazine picture of Esther, but she denies that it's her. The night nurse joins them and shares her experience of working in an understaffed and overcrowded state hospital during the day. Esther interprets this as a warning that she must either get better or be sent back to the state hospital.
The next day, Esther is intentionally deprived of breakfast by the nurse on duty. She believes it's a mistake, but the nurse informs her that she will receive breakfast later, which means she is scheduled for a shock treatment. Esther feels betrayed by Dr. Nolan, who failed to warn her about the treatment as promised. Dr. Nolan justifies her decision, explaining that she didn't want Esther to worry all night. She vows to be there with Esther throughout the procedure to ensure it is carried out correctly. Esther is accompanied by a nurse named Miss Huey to the electrotherapy room, where she is reassured soothingly. As soon as Esther receives the first shock, she immediately loses consciousness.
Esther awakens to find Dr. Nolan by her side. Dr. Nolan escorts her back to Belsize and informs her that she will undergo treatments three times a week until she feels better. The suffocating bell jar that had entrapped her has lifted, allowing fresh air to pour in.
Using a knife, Esther cracks her breakfast egg. She recalls her fondness for knives, but her recollection becomes muddled, causing her thoughts to "swing, like a bird, in the center of empty air." Observing Joan and another patient named DeeDee seated at thepiano, Esther pities both of them, realizing they struggle to maintain lasting relationships with men.
Buddy Willard sends letters to both Esther and Joan. Joan confesses to Esther that she never particularly liked Buddy, but was fond of his family and used to visit them frequently until Esther started dating him. Esther remembers catching Joan and DeeDee together in bed that morning, feeling a mix of fascination and revulsion towards Joan, who mirrors her own traits like a "wry, black image." In her therapy session later, Esther asks Dr. Nolan what women find in one another that they can't find in men. Dr. Nolan replies with "tenderness."
Joan reveals to Esther that she actually prefers her over Buddy. Esther reflects on the eccentric women like Philomena Guinea and Jay Cee, who desire to guide and shape her according to their own ideals. She retorts to Joan that she makes her nauseous and leaves the room.
With Dr. Nolan's approval, Esther gets fitted for a diaphragm. She despises the idea of being controlled by a man through pregnancy, but experiences guilt due to her lack of maternal instincts. Once the diaphragm is in place, she feels liberated and decides to seek out a man to sleep with.
Joan informs Esther that she will be discharged from Belsize on the first of next month. Esther feels a pang of jealousy, as she too is set to be released when the winter term begins at her college. However, she is annoyed that Joan has beaten her to freedom. Although Esther promises to visit Joan, she privately doubts that she will follow through.
A day after Joan's release, Esther encounters a tall and unattractive, yet intelligent-looking man named Irwin at the library. Irwin asks Esther out for coffee, and then they end up at his apartment for a beer. While they enjoy their drinks, a woman named Olga unexpectedly shows up at the door. Esther suggests to Irwin that he should let Olga in, but he insists that Esther's presence would upset her.
Feeling determined, Esther calls Dr. Nolan and obtains permission to spend the night away from the asylum. She tells Dr. Nolan that she will be staying over at Joan's in Cambridge. Esther believes that Irwin is the ideal man to lose her virginity to. He is intelligent and worldly enough to compensate for her own inexperience, and she views him as a stranger whom she willnever have to see again. Ever since discovering Buddy's infidelity with Gladys, Esther feels like her virginity has become a burden, weighing her down.
Irwin takes Esther out for a meal and then escorts her to his apartment. Initially, Irwin doubts Esther's claim of being a virgin until they engage in sexual intercourse. Esther hopes for a profound transformation to occur within herself, but instead she only experiences intense pain. Following their encounter, she bleeds heavily, but she takes pride in becoming a part of a long-standing tradition associated with the physical aftermath of such an act.
Concerned for Esther's well-being, Irwin offers to drive her home, and she provides him with Joan's address instead of the asylum's address. However, during the drive, Esther begins to hemorrhage. Joan finds her in this critical condition and rushes her to the emergency room. The doctor informs Esther that her excessive bleeding is an extremely rare occurrence.
Returning to the asylum to rest, Esther is awakened by Dr. Quinn, Joan's psychiatrist. It is then revealed that Joan is missing. Although questioned about Joan's whereabouts, Esther denies having any knowledge. The following morning, Dr. Quinn returns to deliver the devastating news that Joan has taken her own life by hanging herself in the nearby woods.
It is winter, and Esther is just days away from being released if she successfully passes an interview with the board of directors at the asylum. She is anxious about how everyone will react to her return. While her mother promises to pretend her six-month absence was just a bad dream, Esther knows that she will never forget her experiences under the bell jar, as they have left a lasting impact on her.
Buddy Willard pays Esther a visit, but she finds herself feeling
incredibly bored in his presence. She helps him shovel snow off his car, and he voices his concern about who would want to marry her now that she has been institutionalized. He also questions if he was the reason for her and Joan's mental illness, but Esther reassures him that he was not to blame.
Valerie bids farewell to Esther, and she wonders if the oppressive and distorting effects of the bell jar will ever return in any form or anywhere. She calls Irwin to ask him to cover her medical bill from the night of the hemorrhage, and she makes it clear that she wants nothing more to dowith him. She finally feels a sense of freedom.
Esther attends Joan's funeral and reflects on what she is burying, listening to her own steady heartbeat and repeating the phrase "I am, I am, I am." She tries to ground herself in her own existence.
At Belsize, Esther waits nervously in the waiting room before her release interview. She had hoped to feel confident in her recovery, but instead, fear and uncertainty consume her. She feels that there should be some sort of ritual to mark her rebirth and approval to move forward. Dr. Nolan appears to provide reassurance, and the novel concludes as Esther steps into the room filled with doctors, ready to face whatever lies ahead.